Some Absurd and Silly Teachings of Muhammad

By Keith Thompson

Because Muhammad was demon possessed (as I demonstrated here and here) and also under the control of black magic, he went mad and produced some of the most crazy and irrational teachings known to man.

Muhammad taught spitting to the left stops bad dreams. In Sahih Bukhari we read, “Narrated Abu Qatada: The Prophet said, ‘A good dream that comes true is from Allah, and a bad dream is from Satan, so if anyone of you sees a bad dream, he should seek refuge with Allah from Satan and should spit on the left, for the bad dream will not harm him’” (Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 9, Book 87, Hadith 115). This is strange and superstitious.

Muhammad commanded a grown woman to breast feed a younger man she was not married to. In Sahih Muslim we read, “. . . Sahla daughter of Suhail came to Allah's Messenger and said: Allah's Messenger, I swear by Allah that I see in the face of Abu Hudhaifa (the signs of disgust) on account of entering of Salim (in the house), whereupon Allah's Messenger said: Suckle him. She said: He has a beard. But he (again) said: Suckle him, and it would remove what is there (expression of disgust) on the face of Abu Hudhaifa. She said: (I did that) and, by Allah, I did not see (any sign of disgust) on the face of Abu Hadhaifa” (Sahih Muslim, Book 008, Number 3428). This is twisted.

Muhammad taught some adult breastfeeding is okay. In fact, Muhammad’s wife Aisha claimed verses discussing this in the Koran got lost thereby corrupting the Koran. In Sunan an-Nasa'I we read, “'A'isha reported that it had been revealed in the Holy Qur'an that ten clear sucklings make the marriage unlawful, then it was abrogated (and substituted) by five sucklings and Allah's Apostle died and it was before that time (found) in the Holy Qur'an (and recited by the Muslims)” (Sahih Muslim, Book 8, Hadith 3421). This tradition is confirmed in Sunan Nasa’I “It was narrated that 'Aishah said: ‘One of the things that Allah, the Mighty and Sublime, revealed’ -(one of the narrators) Al-Harith said (in his narration): ‘One of the things that were revealed in the Qur'an’- ‘was that ten known breast-feedings make marriage prohibited, then that was abrogated and changed to five known breast-feedings. Then the Messenger of Allah passed away when this was something that was still being recited in the Qur'an’” (Sunan an-Nasa'I, Vol. 4, Book 26, Hadith 3309). 

Muhammad commanded people to drink camel urine. In Sahih Muslim we read, “Anas b. Malik reported that some people of the tribe of 'Ukl or 'Uraina came to Allah's Messenger, and they found the climate of Medina uncogenial. Allah's Messenger commanded them to milk she-camels and commanded them to drink their urine and their milk” (Sahih Muslim 4132, Abdul Siddiqi Translation, Vol. 3, p. 1078). We see a similar command in Sahih Bukhari, “Narrated Anas: Some people from `Uraina tribe came to Medina and its climate did not suit them, so Allah's Messenger allowed them to go to the herd of camels (given as Zakat) and they drank their milk and urine (as medicine)” (Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 2, Book 24, Hadith 577). However, according to the Australian Department of Health, “The WHO [World Health Organization] advises that people should avoid drinking raw camel milk or camel urine."

Muhammad taught Women have deficient brains and lack common sense. This is taught in Sahih Muslim: “[Muhammad said]: O womenfolk, you should give charity and ask much forgiveness for I saw you in bulk amongst the dwellers of Hell. A wise lady among them said: Why is it, Messenger of Allah, that our folk is in bulk in Hell? Upon this the Holy Prophet observed: You curse too much and are ungrateful to your spouses. I have seen none lacking in common sense and failing in religion but (at the same time) robbing the wisdom of the wise, besides you. Upon this the woman remarked: What is wrong with our common sense and with religion? He (the Holy Prophet) observed: Your lack of common sense (can be well judged from the fact) that the evidence of two women is equal to one man, that is a proof of the lack of common sense” (Sahih Muslim 142, Abdul Siddiqi Translation, Vol. 1. p. 57). Also in Bukhari we read, “The Prophet said: ‘Isn’t the witness of a woman equal to half of that of a man?’ The women said: ‘Yes.’ He said: ‘This is because of the deficiency of her mind’” (Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 3, Book 48, Hadith 826). This is absurd and offensive to women. 

Seal of Prophethood. In the Koran (Koran 33:40) it is said Muhammad was the “seal of the prophets.” This means Muslims believe he was the final prophet. Muslims are very proud the Koran says Muhammad was the seal of the prophets. That is the significance of the seal. But the identity of the seal is where things get quite bizarre. In Sahih Muslim we’re told Muhammad’s seal of prophethood was a bunch of hairy moles between his shoulders, “Abdullah b. Sarjis reported. . . . I then went after him and saw the Seal of Prophethood between his shoulders on the left side of his shoulder having spots on it like moles” (Sahih Muslim 2346). This was supposed to be the proof of Muhammad’s prophethood. As Muslim writer Muhammad Saed Abdul-Rahman says, “. . . between his shoulders was the Seal of Prophethood . . . [which] was a sign of his truthfulness and that he was indeed the promised Prophet” (Muhammad Saed Abdul-Rahman, Islam: Questions and Answers, Vol. 14, [MSA Publication Limited, 2003], p. 166). Yet, the biblical prophets did not have moles proving they were prophets. There is no pre-Islamic prophecy claiming a future prophet will have moles. This is a bizarre Islamic innovation and a very inadequate proof of prophethood. 

Muhammad taught hot weather comes from the hell-fire. In Sahih Bukhari we see: “Narrated Rafi` bin Khadij: I heard the Prophet saying, ‘Fever is from the heat of the (Hell) Fire; so cool it with water’” (Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 4, Book 54, Hadith 484). In the same book we also read, “Narrated Abu Sa`id: that Allah's Messenger said, ‘Pray Zuhr prayer when it becomes (a bit) cooler as the severity of heat is from the raging of the Hell-fire’” (Sahh Bukhari, Vol. 1, Book 10, Hadith 513). This is absurd. Severe heat and fever are a result of the sun causing the earth to heat up, not from hell-fire.

Muhammad forbade lifting ones eyes to heavens during prayer for an odd reason. In Sahih Muslim 862, 863 Muhammad said if people life their eyes to heaven during prayer their eyeballs will be snatched out of their skulls and they will go blind. Yet, people do this all the time and do not lose their eyes. In the Bible Jesus prayed to the Father and “lifted up his eyes to heaven” (John 17:1). He didn’t lose his eyeballs. Similarly, in Daniel 4:34 Nebuchadnezzar said “I lifted my eyes to heaven” (Daniel 4:34) while repenting to God. He did not lose his eyes either. Because of Muhammad’s strange contradiction of this biblical practice, Muslim scholar Ahmad Hasan declares, “All the [Islamic] scholars are agreed that looking to the heaven in prayer is abominable” (Ahmad Hasan, Sunan Abu Dawud, Vol. 1, [Kitab Bhavan, 2012], p. 232).

Muhammad taught Satan urinates in ears and sleeps in noses. In Sahih Bukhari we read: “Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, ‘If anyone of you rouses from sleep and performs the ablution, he should wash his nose by putting water in it and then blowing it out thrice, because Satan has stayed in the upper part of his nose all the night’” (Sahih Bukhari, Volume 4, Book 54, Number 516). Although embarrassed Muslims interpret this in different metaphorical ways to defend Muhammad, it should be noted the distinguished Muslim scholar Muhammad Khan explains this hadith saying: “We should believe that Satan actually stays in the upper part of one’s nose, though we cannot perceive how” (Muhammad Khan, The Translation of the Meanings of Sahih Al-Bukhari, Vol. 4, [Darussalam Publishers & Distributors, July 1997], p. 312). In another hadith in Sahih Bukhari we read, “Narrated ‘Abdullah: It was mentioned before the Prophet that there was a man who slept the night till morning (after sunrise). The Prophet said, ‘He is a man in whose ears (or ear) Satan had urinated’” (Sahih Bukhari, Volume 4, Book 54, Number 516).

Muhammad taught yawning is satanic. In Sahih Bukhari we read, ‘Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, ‘Yawning is from Satan and if anyone of you yawns, he should check his yawning as much as possible, for if anyone of you (during the act of yawning) should say: 'Ha', Satan will laugh at him’” (Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 4, Book 54, Book 509). This is absurd. Yawning is a normal biological function people do every day. It is not “from Satan.”

Muhammad taught men in heaven will have eternal erections. In Sunan Ibn Majah we read, “Abu Umama narrated: ‘The Messenger of God said, 'Everyone that God admits into paradise will be married to 72 wives; two of them are virgins and seventy of his inheritance of the dwellers of hell. All of them will have a pleasant vagina and he will have a sexual organ that does not bend down” (Sunan Ibn Maja, 4337, Vol. 5, Muhammad Tufal Ansari translation, p. 547). This shows Islam is not from a holy God but is the product of a depraved mind of a fallen 7^th century desert nomad.